IN THE NAME OF ALLAH, THE MOST GRACIOUS, THE MOST MERCIFUL
SOME HADITHS ON WHO ARE THE BEST MUSLIMS
Sufyan ibn ‘Abdullah said, “I said, ‘Messenger of Allah, tell me something I can cling to.’ He said, ‘Say: “My Lord is Allah” and then go straight.’ I said, ‘Messenger of Allah, what is the thing you fear most for me?’ He took hold of his tongue and then said, ‘This.'” [at-Tirmidhi]
Abu Sa’id al-Khudri reported that the Prophet, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, said, “When the son of Adam starts the day, all his limbs supplicate his tongue, saying, ‘Fear Allah in respect of us. We move by you. If you go straight, we go straight. If you go crooked, we go crooked.'” [at-Tirmidhi]
Sahl bin Sa`d (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: The Messenger of Allah (PBUH) said, “Whosoever gives me a guarantee to safeguard what is between his jaws and what is between his legs, I shall guarantee him Jannah.” [Al Bukhari and Muslim]
“And spy not, neither backbite against one another. Would any of you like to eat the flesh of his dead brother? You would hate it (so hate backbiting). And fear Allah. Verily Allah is the One Who accepts repentance, Most Merciful.” (Surah Al Hujurat 49:12)
Definition of Gheebah
Gheebah is to talk about your brother in such a manner that he would dislike it if told about it. Whether you talk about a physical defect, lineage, manners, conduct, faith or even his clothes, house or mode of transportation – all those constitute Gheebah. In regards to his body, it could be stating that he is bald, short, tall, black, yellow, or giving any physical description the person does not like. In regards to lineage, it could include stating that his father is a bedouin, a garbage-collector, cobbler, or anything that he may dislike. In regards to manners and conduct, it could include stating that he has bad manners, is stingy, arrogant, a coward, is weak-hearted, irresponsible or the like. In regards to his deeds associated with religion, it could include statements such as he is a thief, a liar, drunkard, treacherous, an oppressor, careless about Salaah or Zakaah, saying he doesn’t perfect his Ruku’ or Sujood, he is not careful about avoiding Najasah (impurities), isn’t dutiful to his parents or he doesn’t pay Zakaah to the right persons, doesn’t divide Zakaah correctly, or he doesn’t guard his Sawm from obscenity, backbiting, or talking ill about others. In regards to his deeds associated with daily living, it could include statements such as he has no manners with people, he talks too much, he always sleeps even when it is not time to sleep, or he sits where he shouldn’t. Gheebah statements about someone’s clothing could include statements such as his sleeve is wide, his thobe (shirt) is long, or that his clothes are dirty.
The Prophet (pbuh) defined backbiting when he said:
Abu Hurairah (May Allah be pleased
with him) said: The Messenger of Allah (PBUH) said, “Do you know what is
backbiting?” The Companions said: “Allah and His Messenger know better.”
Thereupon he said, “Backbiting is talking about your (Muslim) brother in a
manner which he dislikes.” It was said to him: “What if my (Muslim)
brother is as I say.” He said, “If he is actually as you say, then that
is backbiting; but if that is not in him, that is slandering.”
[Muslim].
Commentary: This Hadith elaborates the meaning of backbiting and calumny and points out the difference between the two along with the evils of each one of them. Both these evils are mischief of the tongue and entail great troubles. May Allah save us from both.
Anas (May Allah be pleased with him)
said: The Messenger of Allah (PBUH) said, “During the Mi`raj (the Night of
Ascension), I saw a group of people who were scratching their chests and faces
with their copper nails. I asked, `Who are these people, O Jibril?’ Jibril
replied: `These are the people who ate flesh of others (by backbiting) and
trampled people’s honour.”’
[Abu Dawud].
Commentary: “These are the people who ate flesh of others” is a metaphor for backbiting. “To trample people’s honour” is akin to harming their goodwill and honour. The punishment for these things mentioned in Hadith makes their seriousness obvious.
Backbiting is permissible on 6 occasions only (from An Nawawee)
Don’t harm your brothers
That you surrender your heart to Allah and that the Muslims are safe from your tongue and hand.
Source: Shu’ab al-Imān 20, Grade: Sahih
2..“The best of people are those with the most excellent character.” (Tabarani, Sahih)
Sahih Al-Bukhari Hadith 8.61 Narrated by Masruq
We were sitting with ‘Abdullah bin ‘Amr who was narrating to us (Hadith). He said that the Messenger of Allah (saws) said: ‘The best among you are the best in character (having good manners).’ “
Al-Muwatta Hadith 47.8
Yahya related from Malik that he had heard that the Messenger of Allah (saws) said: “I was sent to perfect good character.”
Sunan of Abu-Dawood Hadith 4782 Narrated by Abu Umamah
The Prophet (saws) said: ‘I guarantee a house in the surroundings of Paradise for a man who avoids quarrelling even if he were in the right; a house in the middle of Paradise for a man who avoids lying even if he were joking; and a house in the upper part of Paradise for a man who made his character good.’
Sahih Al-Bukhari Hadith 5.104 Narrated by Abdullah bin Amr
Allah’s Messenger (saws) neither talked in an insulting manner nor did he ever speak evil intentionally. He (saws) used to say, “The most beloved to me amongst you is the one who has the best character and manners.”
Sunan of Abu-Dawood Hadith 4781 Narrated by Abud Darda
The Prophet (saws) said: ‘There is nothing heavier than good character put in the Scale of a believer on the Day of Resurrection.’
Al-Tirmidhi Hadith 628 Narrated by Abu Hurayrah
The Prophet (saws) said: ‘Among the Muslims the most perfect, as regards his faith, is the one whose character is excellent, and the best among you are those who treat their wives well.’
What is meant by manners?
Linguistically, scholars say that he word ‘Khalq’ which means creation, and ‘Khuluq’ which means manners are inter-related. The first word refers to the physical appearance of a person that can be seen, while the second stands for the deep inner self that can be realized by insight, and both have good and bad characteristics. Al-Imaam Al-Qurtubi defined manners by saying, “It is a person’s way of dealing with others, and it is either to be praised or dispraised. Praised manners are generally achieved by being [good] with others [even] against yourself, and following justice even it is against yourself. In particular, it includes forgiveness, patience, tolerance, generosity, compassion, leniency and so on. On the contrary, dispraised manners include lying, deception, lack of mercy and so on.” Now we are only concerned with the good manners.
Allah (SWT) speaks about the importance of good character in the Noble Qur’an
where HE says:
1. And say to My servants (that) they speak that which is best. (17:53)
2. Worship Allah, and do not associate partners with him. And be good to your
parents, and the relatives, and to the orphans, and to the poor people, and the
neighbour that is close to you and the neighbor that is not close to you, and
your companion on the journey. (4:36)
3. Allah (SWT) speaks about the Holy Prophet Muhammad (SAW) as, “And most
certainly you are on sublime morality (exalted standard of character).”
(68:4)
1.It is related by Abdullah Ibne Amr radhiyallahu anhu that the Apostle of
Allah sallallahu alayhi wasallam said: “The best of you are those who possess
the best of manners.”
Bukhaari and Muslim
2.Abu Hurayrah radhiyallahu anhu related to us that the Apostle of Allah
sallallahu alayhi wasallam said: “Muslims who possess better morals are the
most perfect in Faith”.
Abu Dawood
and Daarami
3.It is related by Abu Dardaa radhiyallahu anhu, that the Apostle of Allah
sallallahu alayhi wasallam said: “On the Day of Reckoning, the most weighty
item in the Scales of Deeds will be good manners”.
Abu Dawood and Tirmizi
Commentary
It would not be correct to assume from the above Traditions that good morals
were even superior to faith or the principal tenets like Imaan, Salaat,
Sawm(fasting), Zakaat and Hajj. The Holy Companions to whom these sayings were
directly addressed had already learnt from the Prophet sallallahu alayhi
wasallam that among the various branches of Islaam, the most important were
Imaan (faith) and the doctrine of Divine Unity, and, then, came the fundamental
duties. As for the rest of the departments of religious life, some of them take
procedence over others in various ways, and the place of moral virtues,
undoubtedly, is very high, and in the attainment of success and salvation in
After-life and the gaining of the countenance of the Lord, their significance
is beyond question.
4.Aaishah radhiyallahu anha relates that she heard the Apostle of Allah
sallallahu alayhi wasallam say: “A Believer with good manners and a good moral
disposition gets the same reward as he who fasts (permanently) and spends his
nights in prayer”.
Abu Dawood
Commentary
It shows that a person who is a true Muslim, both in Belief and Action, and,
also, possesses good manners, but does not engage himself much in nafl
(supererogatory) fasts and prayers attains the same degree of excellence,
through moral goodness, as the one who, generally, stands up in prayer
throughout the night and fasts all day long.
—————————————–
Abu Darda (RA) reported that Rasulullah
(SAW) said,
“Nothing is weightier on the Scale of
Deeds than one’s good manners.”
(Al-Bukhari)
Abu Hurairah (RA) said, “I heard Abu al Qasim say that Rasulullah (SAW), said,
‘The best among you in Islam are those
with the best manners, so long as they develop a sense of understanding.’”
(Al-Bukhari)
Anas (RA) said,
“I served Rasulullah (SAW) for ten
years. During that time, he never once said to me as much as ‘Oof’ if I did
something wrong. He never asked me, if I had failed to do something, ‘Why did
you not do it?,’ and he never said to me, if I had done something wrong, ‘Why
did you do it?”
(Al-Bukhari)
Abu Hurairah (RA) said that Rasulullah (SAW) said,
“If one has good manners, one may
attain the same level of merit as those who spend their nights in prayer.”
(Al-Bukhari)
Abu Hurairah reported that Rasulullah (SAW) said,
“And what is most likely to send people
to Paradise? Being conscious of Allah and good
manners.”
(Al-Bukhari)
Rasulullah (SAW) said,
“He who does not show mercy to our
young or show esteem for our elders is not one of us.”
(Al-Bukhari)
—————————————————————————-
HOW TO GAIN GOOD MANNERS
Firstly:
A good attitude is the characteristic of the best of the Messengers and is the best action of the righteous. It is – no doubt – half of religion, the fruit of the efforts of the pious and the practice of the devoted worshipper. Bad characteristics are lethal poison and lead to shameful consequences.
The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “I have only been sent to perfect good characteristics.” Narrated by al-Bukhaari in al-Adab al-Mufrad (273) and classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in al-Silsilah al-Saheehah (45).
It was narrated that Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) was asked about that which will admit most people to Paradise. He said: “Fear of Allaah and a good attitude.”
Narrated by al-Tirmidhi (2004); he said it is saheeh ghareeb. It was classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Tirmidhi.
Hence Islam paid a great deal of attention to laying down guidelines for treating diseases of the heart (i.e., spiritual diseases) and ways of acquiring good characteristics, which is regarded as one of the most important duties, because no heart will be free of sicknesses. If the heart is neglected, sicknesses will accumulate. No soul is free of inclinatons which, if they are given free rein, will lead it to doom in this world and in the Hereafter.
This kind of medicine requires profound knowledge of reasons and causes, then it needs hard work to remedy it and set things straight, in order to reach a successful outcome. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“Indeed he succeeds who purifies his ownself”
[al-Shams 91:9]
The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) used to pray for a good attitude, saying, “O Allaah, You have made my outward form beautiful so make my attitude good too.” Narrated by Ibn Hibbaan in his Saheeh (3/239) and classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Irwa’ al-Ghaleel (75).
Secondly:
If a person knows what his shortcomings are he can do something to remedy them, but many people are unaware of their faults and shortcomings. A person may see the speck in his brother’s eye and not see the log in his own. The person who wants to know what his own faults are may do four things:
1. He may sit before a Shaykh who has insight into people’s faults and knowledge of the subtlety of some problems and learn from him knowledge, good attitudes and manners.
2. He may ask a sincere friend who has insight and is religiously committed to keep watch over him and take note of his actions, so that he can draw attention to whatever he dislikes of his attitude, actions, and inward and outward faults. This is what the best and greatest imams of Islam used to do. ‘Umar (may Allaah be pleased with him) used to say: “May Allaah have mercy on a man who shows me my shortcomings.”
3. He can learn about his faults and shortcomings from the lips of his enemies, because the eye of one who is resentful will always notice bad things about you. A man may benefit more from an enemy who wants to cause trouble and mentions his faults than from a friend who wants to flatter him by praising him and concealing his faults.
4. He can mix with people. Everything that he sees as blameworthy among people, he should guard against in his own self, because the believer is the mirror of his fellow believer, and in the faults of others he can see his own faults. It was said to ‘Eesa (peace be upon him): “Who taught you?” He said: “No one taught me; I saw the ignorance of the ignorant as something bad and I avoided it.”
Thirdly:
Attitude reflects how a person thinks and the way he is inside. Just as, in general, a person’s outward form cannot be beautiful if only the eyes are beautiful and not the nose, mouth and cheek, and everything must be beautiful in order for the entire outward form to be beautiful, so too there are four requirements of inward beauty which must all be met in order for one’s attitude to be good or beautiful. If all four requirements are met and balanced then a good attitude is acquired, the characteristics of which are: strong knowledge, control of anger, control of desire, and a proper balance between these three aspects.
With regard to strong knowledge, good and sound knowledge means understanding in such a way that one can see the difference between telling the truth and telling lies in speech, between truth and falsehood in beliefs, between beauty and ugliness in actions. If this strength becomes sound, there will result from it wisdom, and wisdom is the head of a good attitude.
With regard to strength of anger, its beauty is that it is used in accordance with what is dictated by wisdom. The same applies to desire; its beauty and strength should be controlled by wisdom, meaning under the control of reason and sharee’ah.
With regard to balance, it means proper control of desires and anger, under the control of wisdom and sharee’ah.
Reason is like a sincere adviser. Justice and balance is power, and it is like one who does what is dictated by reason. Anger is to be subjected to control.
The one who acquires and balances these characteristics is a man of good character in general, and from it stem all good qualities.
No one achieved perfect balance of these four characteristics except the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him); people after him vary in how close or distant they are to him in character. Everyone who is close to him in these characteristics is close to Allaah, to the extent that he is close to the Messenger of Allaah.
Fourthly:
This balance may be achieved in two ways:
1 – By the blessing of Allaah, as part of one’s inherent nature
2 – By acquiring these characteristics through effort and training, i.e., pushing oneself to do the actions dictated by the desired characteristic.
The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Knowledge is acquired by seeking it, and patience is acquiring by striving to be patient. The one who strives to attain good will be given it, and the one who strives to protect himself from evil will be protected. Narrated by al-Khateeb and others from the hadeeth of Abu’l-Darda’; classed as hasan by al-Albaani.
If a person wants to attain the characteristic of generosity, the way to attain that is by pushing himself to do the actions of one who is generous, which is giving away wealth. So he keeps pushing himself and persisting in that, striving against his own inclinations, until that becomes second nature and it becomes easy for him, thus he becomes generous.
Similarly, if a person wants to attain the characteristic of humility, when he is inclined to be arrogant, the way he does it is by persisting in doing the actions of the humble for a long time, striving and pushing himself until that becomes one of his characteristics, and it becomes second nature to him and easy for him.
All praiseworthy characteristics that are prescribed in Islam may be acquired in this way. Religious characteristics will never become entrenched in the soul unless the soul gets accustomed to doing all good habits, unless it gives up all bad habits, and unless it persists in doing good deeds like one who loves good deeds and enjoys doing them, and hates bad deeds and is pained by them.
This may be explained by means of examples:
The one who wants to become proficient in writing, so that this becomes one of his characteristics and writing beautifully becomes second nature to him, has no other way but to hold in his hand that which the proficient writer holds, and persist for a long time, trying to imitate beautiful hand writing, and keep on doing so until it becomes well established in him, then finally beautiful writing will become second nature to him.
Similarly, if a person wants to become a faqeeh, he has no choice but to do what the fuqaha’ do, which is to keep studying issues of fiqh until his heart develops a love of the subject.
And if a person wants to become generous and refrain from asking people, and become patient and humble, he has to keep on doing the actions of those people until they become second nature to him. He should not despair of attaining those characteristics if he fails to study for one night, for he will not be able to attain it with one night’s study. Perfecting the soul and adorning it with good deeds will not be attained by worshipping for one day, and he will not be deprived of it if he sins for one day. But slacking off for one day may lead to another day, then slowly one becomes accustomed to laziness.
Fifthly:
The likeness of the soul and the way to treat it to rid it of bad characteristics and make it attain good characteristics is that of the body, when treating it to rid it of disease and bring it good health.
Although the humours are usually in balance, the stomach may become sick due to food, drink or circumstances. Similarly, everyone is born with a balanced nature, but his parents make him a Jew, Christian or Magian, i.e., by training and teaching one acquires bad characteristics.
Just as the body is not created perfect in the first place, rather it is made perfect by rearing and food, similarly the soul is also created imperfect but with the potential to become perfect, and it can only be perfected by means of education, discipline and nourishment with knowledge. If the body is sound, the doctor’s role is to show one the way to maintain good health; if it is sick, then the doctor’s job is to restore health. The same applies to the soul; if it is pure and sound then one should strive to preserve it and bring it more strength and acquire more good characteristics; if it is imperfect then one should strive to perfect it and purify it.
Sickness that causes imbalance in the body can only be treated by its opposite, so if it is caused by cold it is treated with heat and vice versa. Similarly, bad characteristics, which are diseases of the heart, are treated by applying the opposite. So the remedy for the disease of ignorance is seeking knowledge, and the remedy for the disease of miserliness is pushing oneself to be generous, and the remedy for the disease of arrogance is pushing oneself to be humble, and the remedy for the sickness of eating too much is imposing self restraint.
Just as it is essential to put up with the bitterness of the remedy and show patience in refraining from what one desires when treating physical sickness, so too it is essential to put up with the bitterness of striving and being patient when treating diseases of the heart; rather it is more important, because one gets rid of physical sickness when one dies, but the sicknesses of the heart – Allaah forbid – may persist after death and continue forever and ever.
These examples show you the way to treat diseases of the heart, and demonstrate that the holistic way is to treat them with the opposite of whatever one is inclined towards and likes. Allah has summed up all of that in His Holy Book, when He said (interpretation of the meaning):
“But as for him who feared standing before his Lord, and restrained himself from impure evil desires and lusts.
41. Verily, Paradise will be his abode”
[al-Naazi’aat 79:40-41]
Finally:
What matters with regard to striving is fulfilling what one resolves to do. If a person resolves to give up a desire, then he must show patience and persist, because if he gets used to giving up what he resolved to do, that will lead to corruption. If it so happens that he falls short of what he resolved to do, then he must impose some punishment on himself because of that, because if he does not scare himself with that punishment, his evil inclinations will overwhelm him and he will be attracted to indulging in desires, and all his efforts will be spoiled.
16. (Iblis) said: “Because You have `Aghwaytni’, surely, I will sit in wait against them (human beings) on Your straight path.
17. “Then I will come to them from before them and behind them, from their right and from their left, and You will not find most of them to be thankful.”
Allah said that after He gave respite to Shaytan, (till the Day they are raised up (resurrected)) and Iblis was sure that he got what he wanted, he went on in defiance and rebellion.
He said, (“Because You have `Aghwaytani’, surely, I will sit in wait against them (human beings) on Your straight path.”) meaning, as You have sent me astray. Ibn `Abbas said that `Aghwaytani’ means, “Misguided me.” Others said, “As You caused my ruin, I will sit in wait for Your servants whom You will create from the offspring of the one you expelled me for.”
He went on, (Your straight path), the path of truth and the way of safety. I (Iblis) will misguide them from this path so that they do not worship You Alone, because You sent me astray. Mujahid said that the `straight path’, refers to the truth.
Imam Ahmad recorded that Saburah bin Abi Al-Fakih said that he heard the Messenger of Allah saying,
(Shaytan sat in wait for the Son of Adam in all his paths. He sat in the path of Islam, saying, `Would you embrace Islam and abandon your religion and the religion of your forefathers’ However, the Son of Adam disobeyed Shaytan and embraced Islam.
So Shaytan sat in the path of Hijrah (migration in the cause of Allah), saying, `Would you migrate and leave your land and sky’ But the parable of the Muhajir is that of a horse in his stamina So, he disobeyed Shaytan and migrated.
So Shaytan sat in the path of Jihad, against one’s self and with his wealth, saying, `If you fight, you will be killed, your wife will be married and your wealth divided.’ So he disobeyed him and performed Jihad.
Therefore, whoever among them (Children of Adam) does this and dies, it will be a promise from Allah that He admits him into Paradise. If he is killed, it will be a promise from Allah that He admits him into Paradise. If he drowns, it will be a promise from Allah that He admits him into Paradise. If the animal breaks his neck, it will be a promise from Allah that He admits him into Paradise.)
Ali bin Abi Talhah reported that Ibn `Abbas commented on:
(Then I will come to them from before them) Raising doubts in them concerning their Hereafter,
(and (from) behind them), making them more eager for this life,
(from their right), causing them confusion in the religion,
(and from their left) luring them to commit sins.”
This is meant to cover all paths of good and evil. Shaytan discourages the people from the path of good and lures them to the path of evil.
Al-Hakam bin Abban said that `Ikrimah narrated from Ibn `Abbas concerning the Ayah,
(Then I will come to them from before them and behind them, from their right and from their left,) “He did not say that he will come from above them, because the mercy descends from above.”
`Ali bin Abi Talhah reported that Ibn `Abbas said,
(and You will not find most of them to be thankful.) “means, those who single Him out in worship?.” When Shaytan said this, it was a guess and an assumption on his part. Yet, the truth turned out to be the same, for Allah said,
(And indeed Iblis (Shaytan) did prove true his thought about them, and they followed him, all except a group of true believers. And he had no authority over them, except that We might test him who believes in the Hereafter, from him who is in doubt about it. And your Lord is Watchful over everything.) (34:20-21).
This is why there is a Hadith that encourages seeking refuge with Allah from the lures of Shaytan from all directions. Imam Ahmad narrated that `Abdullah bin `Umar said,
“The Messenger of Allah used to often recite this supplication in the morning and when the night falls,
(O Allah! I ask You for well-being in this life and the Hereafter. O Allah! I ask You for pardon and well-being in my religion, life, family and wealth. O Allah! Cover my errors and reassure me in times of difficulty. O Allah! Protect me from before me, from behind me, from my right, from my left and from above me. I seek refuge with Your greatness from being killed from below me.)”
Waki` commented (about being killed from below), “This refers to earthquakes.” Abu Dawud, An-Nasa’i, Ibn Majah, Ibn Hibban and Al-Hakim collected this Hadith, and Al-Hakim said, “Its chain is Sahih. ”
Source : Tafseer Ibn Kathir 007:al-Araaf – Iblis was the First to use Qiyas (Analogical Comparison) – Dar-us-Salam English Publication
